Gang Activity: Jane Plays Hardball With Joe

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“Isn’t he a wonderful pitcher, Joe? . . . He always hits their bats no matter where they hold them!”

“Actually, Jane, he gets a lot of movement on a pitch he throws called a gyroball. It spins like a ‘spiral’ football. (Or a bullet!) Thing dives down and to the left: very hard to hit.”

“I couldn’t have nothin’ with you, Joe! You completely ruined my joke with your superfluous chatter! Look at the scene in the background! We have a pitcher being taken deep: getting downright schooled. Obviously not your precious ‘D-Mat’— to whom you’ve already assigned that tiresome nickname; before a contract agreement has even been reached —with his wondrous ‘gyroball.'”

“Gee. I’m sorry, Jane.”

“Go to hell, Joe.”

[Portland Press Herald (AP): Sox take step to shore up rotation]